While Peter was below in the courtyard, one of the servant girls of the high priest came by. When she saw Peter warming himself, she looked closely at him. “You also were with that Nazarene, Jesus,” she said. But he denied it. “I don’t know or understand what you’re talking about,” he said, and went out into the entryway. When the servant girl saw him there, she said again to those standing around, “This fellow is one of them.” Again he denied it. After a little while, those standing near said to Peter, “Surely you are one of them, for you are a Galilean.” He began to call down curses, and he swore to them, “I don’t know this man you’re talking about.” Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times.” And he broke down and wept.

What causes us to deny or be unloyal to those we are closest to? Usually this is because they are not acting in the way we think they should.

As I look at Peter here, before his denials, he was recently rebuked for cutting off the servant of the High Priest’s ear. Peter likely wanted to defend Jesus and conquer and be victorious over the hypocritical Pharisees. He may have wanted Jesus to free him and the people from oppression inside and outside the Jewish faith. Peter decided to not be associated with Jesus after his arrest.

Judas, earlier, was likely angry about the unlogical way (in his mind) Jesus defended Mary for anointing him with the super expensive perfume. He turned, out of anger and frustration, to betray him.

When we don’t get our way, and the way ahead seems full of pain or like a terrible path, at times we can get mad at Jesus or God. I have fallen into this trap. Sometimes, like Judas, it is overt anger — the betrayal with a kiss. Other times, like Peter, it is inside us and comes out covertly. He just denies association with him.

But Jesus looks at the heart response to the challenge. Mary had a heart to honor him. Judas’ heart was full of a lifetime of sin and corruption. Peter’s heart made some sinful choices, but after he recognized it, he wept and repented. It matters to God what we do. And it matters more to him how we recover from our failures and continue to follow him.

Lord, teach me to trust you and honor you even more in my challenging times. Help me to stay loyal to the cause of Jesus Christ. If and when I fall, may I repent and recover quickly to be restored to a right relationship with you, like Peter did. Thank you for never giving up on me.